Back and Forth

back and forth
the idle swinging of a rocking chair
my past in full swing
vanishing before re-appearing again
my current state
a torn man, both parts at opposite ends
of the see-saw
my future self, beat
across the table like a pingpong ball
my focus shifting, watching the match intensively
decisions made
trying to keep the score even
balancing level headed
undone as I undo the tie
once a religious loner
little care for the physical world
far removed from human life
accordingly adds up
now on a spiritual journey
with both legs planted firmly in the sand
how quickly it can change
dust swept away by wind
my heart invested in this world
as I am figuring out where my head is at
touched by a spirit
a rock solid image, a hand touching
reaching my soul
as tiny pieces swirl around us
ow how fragile this being is
the flesh is just that
craving it like cannibal
not that special if it doesn’t come from within
my body a vessel
the mind carrying around memories like photographs
the future blank
keep grabbing at straws, plucking rose petals
keep going back and forth
between one, and my other half